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 by: Kathryn Nelson I have a love hate relationship with American Apparel. Don’t get me wrong, their mantra on labor rights and wage equality are admirable, and I adore their perfectly monotonous t-shirts, but sometimes their urban hipster, pseudo cultish brand makes me want to dry heave. Don’t believe me? Check out AA’s newly unveiled spring wears that will remind you of your junior high gym class mixed with a dash of DIY porn. You may remember from 1985 that scrunchies have a number of different uses, not the least as hair ties and bracelets. Leave it to AA to bring back the fabric-covered elastics (only in five colors? Damn.) so you can pretend to be a professional gymnast any time of the year.  • Photo: Nylon Tricot Scrunchie The Unisex See-Thru Tank congers up one particular recollection of my adolescent experience: the stench of unwashed, gym class pinnies. I’ve always believed they would make great shirts, with their bag-like shape and shear mesh weaving. Thanks AA for making my middle school fashion dreams a reality!  • Photo: The Unisex See-Thru Tank Nothing says subtly like a unisex, winged-sleeved, hologram hoody.  • Photo: Unisex Shiny Bat Wing Hoody And finally, to compliment my pinnie/scrunchie outfit is the Double U-Neck Long Sleeve Bodysuit. These “bodies” as they were once called, are perfect for wearing under jeans or with a satin baseball jacket circa 1990-1993. Unfortunately, it’s unclear where the button fasteners are located, but with all luck I bet they’re under the crotch like the originals.  • Photo: Double U-Neck Long Sleeve Bodysuit
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full name: Maile Devineage: 26residence: Hood River, ORhometown: Hood River, ORyears skating: 8favorite skateparks: Aumsville, Windells, Toledo, Medford, love them allPBR or Hamms: Hamms, cheaper and not...
